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Saturday, February 5, 2011

Why Boys Suck!

As if the total boy atmosphere I work in isn't bad enough, today I walk in and it is like dude times ten. All the guys were scrunched around a single screen whispering, or so they thought. As soon as I walk up they all turn around like a bunch of teenagers caught in the girls' locker room. After a bunch of blubbering I finally elbowed my way past Linus to see some Tomb Raider video that could only be described as porn. Porn on the internet doesn't shock me but come to find out it is some lame guy's response to the whole Ken winning Barbie back thing. All I can say is the video played out to Barbie walking in and catching Ken with Lara Croft. So disgusting. Ryan McCord is the leader of this group, he should have more class. He should respect the beauty surrounding him and not get caught up in some ridiculous ideal. It makes him just like Ken, unable to have a real, meaningful relationship with a girl who would do anything for him. I mean, I am sure there is some girl out there who would feel that way.

While I am no big fan of the big DD Barbie idiocy that men are told to like, but I must defend her honor.  To sit there and watch her be betrayed by some plastic casanova who is wooed away by the seemingly double Gs of an animated whore who could not possibly be as skilled at tomb raiding as she portrays herself to be. Her boobs alone would get in the way of being successful. And when she is being chased I am sure she would have taken it in the chest at least once by now. To think Lara could come in and wreck a 40+ year relationship just cause she's newer is just sad. And to top it off he doesn't even apologize, he tries to guilt Barbie into taking him back by some public declaration? Why not put the truth on the poster. "I can't keep my non-specific private area in my pants, I don't deserve you!" That's what the billboards should say. Ken deserves to have those lame billboards all over town and I hope Barbie shoves one up his non-existent ass. Not to mention takes down Lara with a shiv.

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